Youtube

Just wondering, should I start making youtube videos? Like normal teenager...Hmm...Give me some comments :)

Cheery Cheers :)

Lost and gained.

In the month of June, I lost a close friend, and I lost a potential close friend.

I've gain lessons of life and other new friends.

The close friend that I lost, I actually lost him about more than a year for now. I decided to not hang on the that friendship anymore. Coz it really cut me inside. It cut me really deep inside. I can say that I've learnt from this incident through the hard way. That friend never understood me the way I thought he did. It's really saddening to me, well, I would say it was partially my fault for expecting too much out of him. I'm really disappointed that he wasn't of certain intellectual level as compared to his age. He really proved to me that being older doesn't mean wiser. Maybe it's because I'm sensitive, but hey! that's just me. I'm made up of characteristics and one of it is being sensitive. That's part of me and you should just accept me for who I am being my good friend. Instead, he keeps trying to change me. He may think that it's helping me but, I didn't need any help at all. He merely wants me to conform to his ways. He doesn't understand that I view the world differently then he does.

In conclusion, I learnt from this case that I shouldn't expect things out of people. Coz I will always get disappointed. I should get out before I cut myself deeper and deeper. Through this, I saw who my true friends were that will stick by me in times of my need.

I got to know this new friend. I lost a potential close friend because of my foolishness. I had a crush on him as I really admired him for being so smart and fun. I really enjoyed talking to him coz I felt that he was very mature in his thinking, not like any of the guys that I know. I told him my feelings and things were never the same. I should have expected that. I mean, even though we say we can still be friends but there is a difference from the way he treats me before and now. I know. Slowly, we're not even texting anymore. Sure, I'm totally embarrassed about it. I'm moving on, or at least that's what I tell myself. Now, I just wish we can be good friends.

I learnt from this, that if a guy is so good, I should keep him as a friend instead.As friends, I'll never lose him.

What's loss, can't be recovered. I can only cherish what I have at the moment. God, Family and freedom.

Cheery Cheers! :D

July :)

Wow, I realised how long have I not blogged already! :/ sorry for my readers if I have any :)

Anyway, I was busy with camps in June. The Superteens and Smart kids Camp! :) It's the best camp ever!!! I got to know loads of people and have loads of fun! XOXO :)


It's July now! OMG! So fast..

I'm guilty of not been to karate training, July is a new month and my resolution is to train more! :) Been eating too much! :)

June I gain and I lost. I lost a close friend, I lost a potential close friend. Will talk more on the next post :) Oh well :)

I'm so excited for Sept! :P coz I will be travelling again!!! :) YAY!!! This time, some where further! Bangkok! :) Without my parents :D I like to travel with just me and one other companion. It makes things so much easier :)

Anyway, I recently dyed my hair to brown colour :) hehe, I thought red colour didn't really suit me.

                                    I was kinda sick for the whole of this week, down with a throat infection :/

                                     I like this picture so much! I like how my brown eyes can be seen :P

I went to Admiralty Sec's concert recently :) It was pretty good at first and I like a poem. The poem was about no two people being alike. I really like it, instead, I found another one that is very related to my situation in the net :)

This is the poem :) Meaningful to me because, there are people who think that because me and my sisters are twins, we are same in every way. We may look similar but our personalities are poles apart.

Oh well, Over being angry or upset with that person. I just have to stop taking things so seriously...like OMG..I'm like killing myself....

Anyway, gonna go start on the next post about something I've lost in this month. I've gain new friends :) I've started going for singing lessons too! :)

Cheery Cheers! :D

JUMP!!!

hey guys!!!

jump is officially airing!!!! Yay!!! Did you guts watch? Haha!!! It is a true blue comedy that reflects the education system in Singapore :P It's really good!!! Go watch if you haven't!!!

That's all for now guys, :)

Currently at tp waiting for @smileyraeann to finish cheerleading :)

Cheery cheers :)

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家家有本难念的经- every family has a difficult mantra?

Today was a holiday for both my younger sisters coz it's a make-up for sat's vesak day holiday. In my opinion, teachers wants a break...but well, I do think teachers deserve such a break :)

So my title...it's a lil odd from the translation isn't it? haha!! I mean...every family has their own problem that others do not see. I personally feel and I know that I am insecure and super sensitive. But I can't help it...I was raised in a way that caused me to be like that...then why isn't my sisters like that? I can then say that it's because I was treated quite indifferently in my family. As the eldest, but not really eldest coz I'm just the elder of the twins. My parents made me responsible for things that I'm not even suppose to be responsible about, my younger sisters...especially my twin sis. I shouldn't and can't be responsible for a person that is 4 minutes younger than me...doesn't make any sense does it? that's like asking a kindergarten class, those born in january to teach those born in feburary. It is utter bullshit.

I cycled just now from my house to Thomson Plaza :) It's just a 10 min cycle? hahaha!!! I was then discussing about my mother with my younger sister. I feel that she is a very typical singaporean...and then I got offended when my sis said my character was like my mom...I was like NO!!!! I in every way am different from my mother...maybe in certain ways but not TOTALLY the same :) 

My mother uses a singaporean teaching method. Authoritative method. She makes her children scared of her before they are scared of anything else. Yes, it's that bad...I know that my mum reads my blog...however, I'm saying all these things for her to change if she wants to improve her relationship with us. I mean seriously, there is a lot of things we are hiding from her and that is so not good. It's not like every kid have to tell their parents everything..but not telling their parents anything is bad. So...I think if I she knew what style to use so that we can become 'close friends' with her, she'd be glad :)

Over protective, can cause a child to be STUPID. Yes, that means to be a retard in life. Coz in life, studies isn't everything...if it is, most probably, your child will grow up to be a machine (which means, will move when ordered specifically what to do) So, C'mon! I mean, no parent will want such a child right? Unless, the parent is insecure herself in a way that she wants a puppet that will listen and adore her...My mom always talks about things she could achieve when she was younger and at that time without a father. I mean, STOP TALKING ABOUT THE PAST! It's over and besides, I have both my parents' that love me.

Then I was talking about the curfew my mom set for me. 10pm. my sis then said that she has a friend whom is 21 years old and has that curfew..I could only imagine his pain. I feel that 10 pm is seriously early...at least before 12am! I'm young and I have the energy to stay up late and beside I have the time to wake up late the next day. It couldn't be that I do that when I'm only 30 right? I'm only young once and parents know that...so why can't they understand that we are young and we're meant to have fun?!

I understand that they are concern about their child especially, daughters, I mean, if I were to dope and smoke, I would have done so back in secondary school or in MDIS. But I didn't, so why can't they just implement a little trust and let me go out and come back late? I'll probably catch the last train back...

By saying all these, I don't mean that I don't love my parents, I LOVE MY PARENTS. and I respect them, however, I only respect them because they are my parents...I mean if they aren't my parents and they have such characters, honestly, I will think them of losers.

I think my mother should go out and have fun with her friends occasionally or join some class. She needs social life! Family, work and God shouldn't be only her things in life...We need more. 

I've never seen my mother shed a tear, but I really do hope she cries when nobody is with her. She needs to channel her unpleasant feelings into tears and release them instead of bottling up and become a time bomb that endangers my sisters and my life. Back when I was 9, I remembered, that I was a problem to my mother and to my form teacher..I remembered, I dislike that teacher very much coz he held my recess time to make us do work. I felt like a donkey...all work and no rest. Being 9 and I knew that I had to channel my anger towards that teacher out. After PTC one day, (obviously, the teacher talked bad about me and I felt really bad about myself) my mother scolded me and then I went back to my room sulking, took my favourite notebook and started writing lines something like *I hate Mr *** * over and over again. I planned to write till I got rid of that lousy feeling and anger. However, my mother upon knowing I did that, she snatched my book, gave me a slap on my face and tore that page off and told me *how can you write such things?!* I just cried in anger.

I really thought I did nothing wrong, I was writing it on MY notebook (like a diary) and I was harming no one..besides I didn't write I wanted to kill that teacher. I then learnt my lesson that letting my anger out this way will cause me to get a slap on my face and that I should bottle up my anger.

I constantly have the feeling of helplessness and maybe that's why I'm afraid of everything. I need something with me constantly, not just a presence but physically with me. That's why I want a bf that will be with me all the time. But I think I'll pity my bf coz he has to keep reassuring me.

Oh well, look at the time! Gotta go slp...talk more next time alright? :)

Cheery Cheers :)

I can talk to my computer

I was just meddling with my computer at this unearthly hour. Speech recognition wasn't as easy as I thought it would be.

Speech recognition was much of an idiot. Somehow typing is easier than speech recognition. Speech recognition couldn't catch what I was saying most of the time. It is really frustrating. I think I'd just need to get used to talking to the speech recognition in a fake the British accent. I find it very ironic that I've actually having to speak like that and it isn't my English oral.

Speech recognition is quite off a hassle. I wish speech recognition could speak singlish. I actually taught the computer the word singlish... I got so frustrated that I stop talking and started typing...which in turn is much faster...so exasperating! :/

Well, I got a new plan to follow so goodnight every one ;)

Cheery Cheers :)

Fabulous ;)

Recently my weekends have been fabulous! :) hahahaha!!! :)

Last weekend, I was the official for a Karate Event and the following day, I was at the Dinner and Dance! :) It was like a 2nd prom :) J coming over to prepare and then my mum send us there in the evening :) It was fabulous :)

                                                    Me and J :)

After that, last Sunday, I was at Star Awards 2 with R! :) hahahahaha!!! I think I looked nicer at star awards :) with my new dress :)

                                            Jump Group Shot at Star Awards 2 :)

I think everybody looked FABULOUS! :)

Just today, I went to play badminton at the new Pasir Ris Recreation Centre :) It was fun playing with my cousin and his friends! :) Glad to meet new people ;) 

The following day, I have nothing to do...so, I was thinking of being a girl ;P I prepared recipes for me to cook lunch and bake ;)

I love to bake!

Cheery Cheers! <3